As a psychotherapist who specializes in emotions, and as a woman with my own personal history of serial monogamy, I have come to realize that some men channel their need for love, intimacy, soothing, care, and comfort into sexual desire.
Dylan wants sex when he feels sad because he likes the comfort the physical holding provides. Dylan, like most people, wants to be held when he is sad. Is sex a need for men fact, the need to be held when we feel sad is biologically programmed into our brains. He believes it is weak to let someone know that he feels lonely and wants company.
Alternatively, he thinks it is acceptable to find and ask for sex, which satisfies his need for human connection. Sexual excitement is a core emotion. Sexual excitement is often physically felt as sensations in the groin area with an impulse to seek orgasmic release. Sadness, anxietyloneliness, anger, and fear are other emotions that can combine with sexual excitement.
The mashup of the tender emotions with sexual excitement is the brilliant way the mind can make sure core human needs are met in consciously covert "Is sex a need for men" culturally acceptable ways. Mental health is improved by being in touch with the full range of our core emotions. Therefore, it is in our best interest to know which core emotions are present and driving our desire for sex.
Is it pure sexual excitement? Is it a need for comfort? Is it a need for connection? If men and boys could own the full range of their emotions, not just anger and sexual excitement, we would see trends in depression and anxiety decrease. When we block our core emotions sadness, fear, anger and needs for intimacy love, companionship, sharing of feelings, closeness men and women develop symptoms including anxiety, shame, and depression.
Symptoms go away when we become reacquainted with our core emotions. This first step to wellness comes from understanding that it is normal for both men and women to experience sadness, fear, love, anger, and longing for connection both sexual and through talking about our thoughts and feelings with each other. Emotions are not for the weak, they are for the human. Although things are slowly changing, the two main emotions that are most acceptable for men to display are still sexual excitement and anger.
So Is sex a need for men is not surprising that the tender emotions, which have to be expressed in some way, get bound to sexuality. In fact, channeling needs for comfort and soothing into sex is actually a clever compromise. After all, during sex men can unabashedly get held, stroked, kissed, hugged, and loved up all under the acceptable guise of a very manly act — that of sexual prowess.
But we can do better by helping to change the culture of masculinity so it is in sync with our biology. Couple embracing photo available from Shutterstock. She is a certified psychoanalyst and AEDP psychotherapist and supervisor. She has published articles in The New York Times and professional journals. She lives in New York City. For more information and free resources for mental health visit: Find help or get online counseling now.
Here are some examples: Know that humans are complex creatures.
We all have weak and strong parts. Retrieved on November 7,from https: Hot Topics Today 1. As a psychotherapist who specializes in emotions, and as a woman with my own personal history of serial monogamy, I have come to realize.
The message couldn't be more obvious: When it comes to sex, men and women have very different needs. This used to be something people. According to social psychologist, Roy Baumeister, it's expected that your man will have a sex drive higher than yours. Through a study.
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While most women discharge emotional connection lure precedence over a physical connection, object of men sex is one of the many ways he shows love. It sounds shallow but men are wired in a velocity that sex or the prospect of sex makes them attracted to a woman. Love becomes into the look-alike well after the attraction episode. You might wonder why it is that men care so much about copulation. Or why is sex important to men?
Women take wondered for years why this in perpetuity proves to be one of the most important aspects of any relationship. Though sex matters to women at first , when they get contented in a relationship or when there are other articles going on in the dynamic, anon sex is again the first affection to go. There is a multitude of reasons why sex in a marriage is so important to men, and why it always will be. To understand the importance of intimacy in marriage, you have to look at this from a male nitty-gritty of view, and that may be hard at times.
Women need the romance, the passion, and the chemistry to tell her that the swain is alive and going well. Women need to be loved and cherished, and this is often through enunciated signs of goodwill.
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